Deceased

19 May 2009

Opening sequence for an Americanised TV show about some guys who are working to politicise the dead.

Bar late at night. Everyone at the table has had too much to drink.

Trouble is the fat guy says, they got so little profile, so little motivation and no organisation whatsoever.

What do you expect? says some newcomer rookie bearing tray full of drinks – the dead have nowhere to live..

Hey, says a jaded looking woman, we don’t call them dead round here, we call them Deceased.

Fat Guy: Whatever. Don’t mind her, bad day. The next round is on me… Their possessions get dished out to others, their properties get taken away from them..

Plus – (another rookie, this one a Latino) – you even try to get a lawyer, a cop or a social worker to speak to… the deceased and see how fast you get laughed out of the room.

Brunette With Attitude: “NO DOGS. NO DECEASED” I saw that sign.

Fat Guy: On top of that, on top of that even – most of them are confused.

Jaded Woman (laughing): Yeah. Worse than the schizos.

Rookie One: Whaddya mean?

Fat Guy: Most of these guys just don’t know how the world works anymore.

Another Fat Guy: I never saw such cluelessness.

Rookie Two (Latino): PLUS the dead are getting shafted day in and day out on issues like intellectual property. It’s basic stuff.

Rookie One: Underdogs?

Another Fat Guy: Those suckers make illegals look lucky.

Brunette With Attitude: So hard to get them motivated. And so hard to get them to think about the bigger picture.

Fat Guy: Some Deceased been that way a long time and they still can’t see further than the accident or the fact their husband remarried so quick. Try getting them interested in Unionisation? Or a protest march of some kind? Forget about it.

*

Meanwhile, on another note, liking this from Lars Von Trier at a Cannes Press Conference for his horror movie Antichrist.

“I don’t have to justify myself. I make films and I enjoy very much making them. You are all my guests, it’s not the other way round. I work for myself and I do this little film that I’m now kind of fond of and I haven’t done it for you or the audience so I don’t feel I owe anyone an explanation.”

*

And watch out for the mockingbirds.